The gift and the curse of feeling everything so deeply.
There is some subject matter from which I have to protect myself. I’ve learned this as I’ve grown in self-awareness and understanding. That is why I could not watch the Trayvon Martin docuseries, why I can barely stomach the news, and cannot read too many stories about the violation and abuse of children. I absorb enough knowledge to be informed on important events and issues, but can’t go much further than that.
It’s just too heavy at times, the weight of it all. Most of us are incensed, offended and even saddened by the terrible things that happen in our world, and the awful things done to and by other human beings. But for some of us, it goes a step further, becoming overwhelming and incredibly draining because you feel the pain of others just as deeply and often even more so than your own. In addition to general outrage and sorrow, there can sometimes come a feeling of not even wanting to be here — in this world, with people who do commit these atrocities. That’s not to say that you want to remove yourself from existence, it just becomes increasingly difficult to identify the point of it all.
If this is you, you are likely an empath. Welcome.
Not exclusively in the paranormal sense, but an empath is defined as: one who experiences the emotions of others : a person who has empathy for others. You want to turn it off — your thoughts and unrelenting internal responses that prevent you from just “getting over it,” but you can’t. When everyone else has discussed, expressed frustration and moved on with their days, you seem to remain stuck in that place a little while longer.
The sensation is magnified when someone whom you actually have a relationship with is involved. You literally cannot stand to see a person that you love mistreated or hurting. You can feel their sadness, even if they have yet to verbalize it, and see past what may be visible on the surface, such as fake smiles. While others may be able to simply mind their own business and avoid emotional attachment to the situation, your heightened sense of awareness and intuition won’t allow you. It keeps you awake at night, worrying and lamenting scenarios both true and a figment of your empathetic imagination. I’ve done it. And it makes you sick.