There are Too Many “Not My Problem” People

4 min readMay 30, 2020

And not enough people holding others accountable for their actions.

Photo by Matheus Ferrero on Unsplash

I’m guilty of being a “not my problem” person on occasion. Not because I don’t care, but because I’m prone to getting wrapped up in and weighed down by situations beyond my control. I’ve had many sleepless nights agonizing over why a friend won’t leave a painful relationship or worrying about the parenting of my nieces and nephews. I’ve felt indifferent to being in this world because of how awful people can treat one another.

I never adhered to the “mind your own business” directive until minding others’ business started to erode my mental and emotional health. I cared too much. I learned that I needed to be selective about how much negative stimuli I allow, with the understanding that it can be difficult for my spirit to carry.

I’m an empath by nature — a logical, integrous one at that.

I don’t understand deciding against your best interest, doing things that don’t make sense, or deceiving and treating people that you claim to love poorly.

I don’t understand hatred, cruelty, or the inherent concepts of racism and oppression. I comprehend the motive behind oppressive systems and that many of those who engage do so for their gain. They keep others down to protect the privilege of a superior position.

What I can’t fathom is why or how people can so easily justify unwarranted suffering. Is it cognitive dissonance? Is it seeing the afflicted as subhuman? And if so, why? We all bleed red, walk on two legs, and look internally identical. What makes anyone believe that they’re better than the next person and innately entitled to anything?

I’m unable to grasp where one must go within themselves to trigger unprovoked responses and irrational outlooks. It doesn’t make sense, and I need it to. So, I often find myself pondering questions that don’t have answers.

I also don’t understand why we watch or aid others in doing things with which we fundamentally disagree.

Even on a smaller scale — helping friends cheat on their spouses, aiding loved ones in deceiving other people, standing by as…




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